Audacious - CupcakKe - 2016

Favorite Tracks: Mistress, LGBT, Spider-Man Dick, Ace Hardware

When I think of CupcakKe, so many memories flood through my head. Of course the first things that come to mind are some of her iconic and (albeit at the time, controversial) explicit verses from songs like Deepthroat and Vagina. For a little while, I had just dismissed her as an ephemeral joke. But as the initial shock and discourse simmered down, I found myself taking more of a liking to her, listening to her music less as a novelty and with more sincerity and connection. One song in particular was the catalyst for my shift in thought, but I’ll get to that one in a minute.

Audacious is the third of her albums, released in 2016 and, in hindsight, marked an evolutionary milestone for her as an artist. This album is one of her strongest in my opinion, probably because of the topical range she demonstrated. She can go from digging through her emotional depths, to describing raunchy and nasty acts of hedonistic pleasure, and then right back to going hard and spitting bars, and that breadth of talent is on full display here.

(Editor’s note: CupcakKe updated the album cover sometime in 2021; though I have a nostalgic connection to the original artwork, I decided to only publish the official updated album cover here).

Songs like Homework, Budget, and Lime bring good beats and rhymes, representative of the evolving landscape of female rap of the time. In addition to the only track (surprisingly) explicitly about sex, Spider-Man Dick, CupcakKe shares a lot about her past life experiences. Though she had touched on some of her traumas in her previous albums, the topics she sang about here stuck with me, in particular, because of current events of the time. Starting with the rise of the Black Lives Matter (BLM) movement that gained national attention a few years prior, she reflected and validated a lot of the sentiments going around in the Black community with the song Picking Cotton, highlighting the injustices and traumatic effects of police brutality in America that had been going on unaddressed for decades before that point. It’s still a sobering song to listen to, now more than ever with the ever-growing hatred and animosity brewing and bubbling up through the cracks in the foundation of our society; but it also imparts an important message of unity, solidarity, and support as a means of maintaining hope.

I remember when tensions began to flare up and people began discussing the morals and ethics of reproductive health, particularly regarding abortion, and whether or not it's murder (obviously it’s not, but if you would like to discuss it further, dissent can be directed to the nearest receptacle). She discusses how she ended up having an abortion in the song, Birthmark, and discusses how powerless she felt about the situation; she would have loved to have a child but wasn’t ready, and more importantly, the way her family treated her after finding out is quite indicative of many other women in this country who have gone through similar experiences and are shunned in a similar manner. It was disheartening, yet eye-opening for teenage me to listen to, in addition to Ace Hardware, another song discussing another difficult topic. Give that one a listen if you’re curious.

CupcakKe was both bold and brave discussing such sensitive topics, especially during that time, but I also couldn’t imagine a more apt time to bring up that discourse. I figured out that she stands up against racism and sexism, but If I didn’t know how I felt about CupcakKe before hearing this one song, I definitely cemented her in my mind as an icon afterward.

LGBT is the song I would consider to be the feature track. Though attitudes were beginning to shift around this time, it still wasn’t commonplace to express your sexuality and accept yourself outwardly. But hearing such a validating message at a tender teen age like 16 was mind blowing for me. It filled me with a sense of purpose and affirmation; it set the foundation for the journey of learning to love myself and gave me the ability to see the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel. In short, she created a timeless gay anthem, single-handedly ending homophobia.

CupcakKe is truly an inspiration, and an influence I wouldn’t want to have grown up without. On a whim in my first year of college, I bought tickets to her show for her new album at the time in my city. It was one of only a few concerts I have ever gone to in my life, but when I walked in, felt such a sense of camaraderie with everyone else there; it was one of the few times in my life where I truly felt like I “fit in” with everyone else on the crowd. No matter what little differences we had, we were all at that concert, united by our love for CupcakKe. We sang all the hits and the new stuff too, and the show ended with a tribute to the love and support from her biggest fans; we turned up to LGBT and made the night unforgettable. I think that concert was one of the few times I had experienced true and utter happiness in my lifetime, and I wouldn't trade it for the world. CupcakKe is a fabulous and sexy woman whose intoxicating confidence and charm has left her imprint on my heart, and for that I am grateful.